Football
The Buckeye Watch
By Tony Gerdeman

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What a great day. It was a quick drive over, a looooong drive back, and everything in between was great.

I wanted to start this column off with a limerick, as Indiana's soccer coach did before kickoff, but I just couldn't bring myself to be as lame as a soccer coach. Plus, I'm no good at limericks. Perhaps if he would've read a haiku, I could have made fun of him in poetic fashion, but as it stands, all of my limerick knowledge is as limited as a ref's sense of judgment.

From the looks of the makeup of the crowd, I think it was at least 60/40 Buckeye fans to Hoosier fans. The parking lots and tailgaters probably numbered 85/15 Buckeye fans to Hoosier fans. I actually saw Jim Davidson getting ready to take some pictures in the parking lot, but I was afraid to bother him. You know how temperamental artists can get. I would’ve gone over to say “Hey”, and he would’ve gotten all upset about ruining his motivation and standing in his light. It just wouldn’t have been worth all of the anguish to everybody else around him.

As far as the game goes, the Buckeyes moved the ball. The refs moved the ball. Indiana, however, didn't move the ball. 6'7" James Hardy, who I believe has had his name legally changed to " 6'7" James Hardy", had a very quiet game. During the postgame, IU radio folk were saying he was injured. I'm just glad he wasn't "defenseless".

Anyway, it was a fun atmosphere and the weather was great. The only thing missing was TBDBITL.

To the Watch...

4:30 a.m. My wife’s brother (who I will heretofore only refer to as MWB) has to wake me up so that we can get on the road. Sometimes in the morning, I have no concept of what an alarm is or why I have to get up. This was one of those mornings.

5:05 a.m. We finally meet up with the rest of our party and head out for Indiana.

9:30 a.m. We make it to our parking lot in Bloomington and there are no Indiana fans here. I hope they didn’t forget that they had a lesson in football today.

10:15 a.m. We walk to Assembly Hall because we all want to get a look at the gym. Every door leading to the court is locked. C’mon, Indiana, we didn’t want to go down there and play HORSE, we just wanted to check out the layout.

11:50 I grab a quick brat. Not bad. Definitely better than that dude parked over at Independence Hall on campus.

12:10 The Indiana soccer coach just read a limerick over the PA system in which he rhymed "boys" (referencing the Hoosiers) and "toys" (as in how they were going to treat the Buckeyes). You see, people, this is what happens when you let soccer get involved with football. Next thing you know, somebody's gonna be sittin' in a tree "k-i-s-s-i-n-g".

12:13 Quick three and out for the Hoosiers. I bet this won't be the last one we see today.

12:16 After an incompletion on 2nd and 25, the offense started trotting off the field thinking it was now 4th down. That's comforting. My theory is that they were just trying to get their most important player on the field--A.J. Trapasso.

12:17 Fumble! Hoosier punt returner Troy Grosfield muffed the punt. Now I see why the Buckeyes wanted to get the punt team out there so badly.

12:21 Touchdown Santonio! Santonio caught the pass on a little in route and broke a tackle and cut it up into the end zone. He's fun to watch when people are trying to tackle him. 7-0 Buckeyes.

12:22 Maybe we should just punt on first down next time and cut out the middle man.

12:26 Dang it. Ashton Youboty just jumped the route but forgot to catch the ball. In the world of woulda shoulda couldas, that was a touchdown.

12:27 The first Memorial Stadium-wide chant of "O-H-I-O" goes up. That's like having a stranger name your baby. Imagine you're at the hospital nursery and you're ready to name your baby and you want to name him "Edward Junior", but the aforementioned stranger walks by and says, "Nope. His name is Carl." And then they put "Carl" on the birth certificate. And then everybody chants "C-A-R-L".

12:31 Did the Big Ten send a memo to the officials telling them to make sure they call clipping this week? That second clipping call on the Buckeye offensive line just killed this drive.

12:43 On 3rd and 13, Blake Powers just completed a great pass to James Bailey for 21 yards and the first down and the band goes crazy! I wonder what happens if they score around here.

12:47 Bucks got the ball back after a Hoosier punt. The first play from scrimmage was a 14 yard run from Antonio Pittman. How about we see some more of Antonio here.

12:48 Pittman just ripped off an 11 yard run. That was already the second time today that they've sent Ginn on the fake reverse. It's only a matter of time until Ginn gets it. Or not.

12:49 The Bucks have marched the ball down the field to the Hoosier 30 yard line and have yet to throw. The Buckeyes shouldn't even be throwing the ball right now.

12:50 Although if you're going to throw, it's nice to be able to throw to Santonio Holmes. Troy Smith just hit him for 12 more yards. And, of course, Santonio broke some more tackles. That dude is the Earl Campbell of wide receivers.

12:52 1st and 10 for the Buckeyes at the Hoosier 15 yard line. Let's get Pittman in the end zone. I predicted three touchdowns today and I'd like to be reasonably close to my prediction.

12:53 Troy Smith just threw an interception at about the 5 yard line that's being run back as I shake my head. It looked like the corner got there before the ball, but he was playing the ball, so I don't really have a huge problem with no pass interference being called. Troy kept staring the receiver down and the corner just jumped it. Fortunately, the dude got tackled before he took it all the way back.

12:58 That's the end of the first quarter with the Buckeyes up 7-0. It just wouldn't be a Buckeye game without something totally lame happening in the red zone.

1:01 On 4th and 4, the Buckeyes force an incompletion and a turnover on downs. At least that's what I initially thought, until a saw a flag and a roughing the passer call. I don't remember seeing him roughed, but I may not have been paying attention.

1:03 Encroachment on the Hoosier offense? When coaches say that they don't mind aggressive penalties, I'm guessing "offensive encroachment" doesn't fall into the realm of acceptability.

1:04 Donte Whitner just busted up a wide receiver screen for a loss of two yards. That dude reads screens like Peyton Manning reads defenses, but without all of the limb-based gyrations.

1:06 Thanks to the Ohio State offense, the Indiana offense gets on the board with a field goal. 7-3 Buckeyes.

1:10 ...and Ted Ginn Jr has just taken the kick all the way back! Or has he. There's a flag right in front of us at the 25 yard line. It was thrown about 20 yards behind the play. Are you kidding me? Personal foul against the Buckeyes for hitting a defenseless player? Are you insane? There are no defenseless players on the kick coverage team. Did somebody go out there without a helmet or pads? Because if you've got those two items, and you're on the field, AND you are "defenseless", you deserve to get hit. So this touchdown is being brought back. If it's a 15 yard penalty, then they're saying the penalty occurred at Indiana's 25 yard line. I don't remember seeing anybody engaged at the 25 while Ginn was running to the house. I'm not even convinced that wasn't a touchdown before the "personal foul" was called. What a weak call. I understand that the refs are trying to protect the players, but who protects the players from the refs?

1:14 On 2nd and 9, Troy went deep to Santonio Holmes in double coverage while Ginn and Gonzo had single coverage. This is one of the most frustrating aspects of Smith's play to date for me. It sometimes seems that he has it set in his mind where he's going before they even get to the line of scrimmage, and it doesn't matter what the defense is doing. That being said, it was a beautiful pass that Holmes dropped.

1:15 The Buckeyes punt. Maybe Penn State fans were on to something with this "ref-paranoia-thing" that they've got going on.

1:21 Some dude in front of me just had the catch of the game. He was coming back from the concession stand with a footlong dog and an order of nachos. He got bumped and almost dropped it all on the dude below him. He got his free arm under the grub, however, and made the as-of-yet-unsponsored Nacho Save of the Game. In other news, the Hoosiers punt.

1:22 Our seats are right below some TV cameras, and there's a kid in front of me with a sign saying he wants on TV. Why do I get the feeling that this sign is going to pop up in front of me on a long touchdown by Holmes or Ginn?

1:23 Cool. Smith just found Holmes in the flats and Santonio turned it up for 28 more yards. Oh, and per usual, he broke another tackle.

1:27 The Buckeyes have it 1st and goal from the 9. Don't forget about Pittman here. He still owes me three touchdowns.

1:27:09 They gave it to him and he got usual zero yard gain inside the 10.

1:28 3rd and goal from the one yard line and Troy Smith kept it for the touchdown. He's keeping Pittman from scoring. As such, I'm going to count that touchdown for Pittman. Ohio State 14-3

1:29 It's a good thing that there were no defenseless players out there for the Hoosiers.

1:31 Ashton Youboty just jumped on another ball and dropped another touchdown. He better not play like this in this year's Grand Crucial Final.

1:32 Speaking of Youboty, he just got beat and then busted for pass interference. He's usually pretty sneaky about his cheating. Not sneaky enough this time, however.

1:34 Indiana punts and Teddy Ginn takes it back to the Buckeyes' 29 yard line. You can just tell he's itching to break one.

1:36 Holy crap! Ryan Hamby for 27 yards. We should call that play more often.

1:38 Hey, all right! Ted Ginn just caught one for 27 yards as well, taking it down to the Hoosier 9 yard line. Hopefully there are no more 27 yard passes on this drive.

1:39 There it is. Pittman for 0 yards on 1st and goal from the 9. I don't know if he has positive yards inside the 10 yard line on the year. He's like the Human Run and Shoot. He's great between the twenty yard lines, but then...well, you know.

1:40 On 3rd and goal from the 9, Jim Tressel called a draw for Pittman that got a few yards. That's confidence in your quarterback. (That's sarcasm.) Huston's field goal makes it 17-3.

1:43 Indiana comes out throwing on this possession. MWB asks why they aren't trying to run the clock out now. "Because they're defending 'The Rock'", I tell him.

1:47 Ted Ginn just had another 27 yard catch. This time it was a wide receiver screen. 27 yard gains are SO last drive.

1:50 The Buckeyes had 3rd and 15 from the Hoosier 31 and Coach Tressel called the one yard loss play for Brandon Schnittker. Boos ensue (but not from Hoosier fans.) Right now, Jim Tressel is choosing not to put the trust in Troy Smith that most head coaches put in their starters. Instead he's leaving it up to Josh Huston to close out the half with another 50 yard attempt. He's 0-2 on the season from 50 yards.

1:51 Make it 0-3. Wide left. At the half, the Buckeyes lead the Hoosiers 17-3.

1:53 275 yards of offense for the Buckeyes. Because of that total, I will choose not to complain about the first half performance. I'll take 275 yards of offense in the first half all day long. The scores that we leave on the field, however, will never stop bothering me. I'd complain about the refs, but what's the point. Idiots don't know that they're idiots. That's what makes them idiots.

2:01 I wonder how close I am to my prediction or 200 yards and three touchdowns for Antonio Pittman. I'm assuming I'm about 140 yards and two touchdowns away. (Don't forget, I'm counting Troy's touchdown for Antonio.)

2:05 At halftime, Indiana is inducting some folks into their athletic hall of fame, including former kicker Pete Stoyanovich. Stoyo looks like Steven Seagal in his long leather jacket, cooky hat, and trademark gut.

2:09 I gotta have more Mellencamp!

2:10 I gotta have more Mellencamp, baby!

2:11 Guess what? I've got a fever! And the only prescription...is more Mellencamp!

2:14 Indiana is kicking off to start the second half. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. D'Andrea fumbled the pooch kick, and Indiana recovered, but the refs blew the whistle. Right now, I'm laughing a very obnoxious laugh at the Indiana sideline. I doubt they can hear me, but it makes me feel good. Imagine if that had come at Penn State. Oh, baby. That would've been worth the price of admission and the endless drive of nothingness to get there. What a great time for a ref to make himself known. Classic.

2:16 Now they're rekicking it? This is awesome. Do over! Why not just have somebody throw the kickoff like we used to do at recess. I think the Big Ten got these refs from an ACC clearance sale. I think I saw one ref blowing the wrong end of his whistle. I wonder how these guys find their homes at night.

2:17 They rekick and Ted Ginn gets a minimal return. I yell out, "Re-kick! Howabout a best out of three?!"

2:20 And Ohio State keeps their streak of about three straight games with a successful screen pass to the running back as Pittman took that one for about 13 yards.

2:23 Okay, maybe I shouldn't have been so laughy at the refs. Ted Ginn just took a quick screen on 3rd and 9 and was fighting for some yards and, I thought, he was stopped. Then out of nowhere, John Pannozzo comes running out of the pack with the ball and takes it to the end zone. Looks like all of the refs were blowing the wrong end of their whistles on that one. Ever hear of forward progress, guys? 17-10 Ohio State.

2:24 This is amazing. This is what I get for making fun of Penn State fans.

2:26 Why must the score always be close when nothing else in the game is?

2:30 The Buckeyes just unleashed a clinic of Big Ten football on Indiana. It was a five play touchdown drive that never saw the ball in the air. It started on Ohio State's 21 yard line at 2:28 and ended at 2:30, and in between was this:

-4 yard run Pittman
17 yard run Pittman
18 yard run Pittman
26 yard run Wells
22 yard run Smith for the touchdown

That was a thing of beauty. It was a joy to behold. Also, Troy could've pitched that ball, so I'm counting that as Pittman's second touchdown. I may as well give him the yards too. 24-10 Buckeyes.

2:33 Another O-H-I-O chant is going on. I think maybe in 2010, or whenever we're back here, we should declare the Indiana game "Homecoming Away From Home".

2:34 Great kickoff return for the Hoosiers. Lucky for them, there were no defenseless players on the field for the Buckeyes.

2:38 The Hoosiers have 3rd and 10 from the Ohio State 12. Malcolm Jenkins is urging the crowd to get loud, which they do. It's just funny to me to see a visiting player telling the visiting crowd to get loud.

2:39 Boom! Kudla with the big sack, pushing them back to shaky ground with this field goal kicker.

2:40 No good. Good stop by the Buckeye defense.

2:42 The Buckeyes just had 3rd and 2 and went to the shotgun. Jim Tressel called a pass, which ended in a sack. Why not just go with the option right, which always gets four to thirty yards? I don't like that call at all.

2:43 So the Buckeyes punted, the Hoosiers got called for a block in the back. Then, like some parent coming out of the stands at a spelling bee yelling that her child had been banished incorrectly, they wave the penalty off. I don't understand how that happens. One dude calls the penalty, then another dude comes over to him and says, "You know, Terry, I've been a ref for going on seven weeks now, and you're only in your third week. You don't even have sick days yet. Why don't you let me make this call?"

2:45 Oh snap! Brandon Mitchell just took an interception back for a touchdown. It looked like he was catching and returning a punt. Fortunately he didn't fair catch that pick. He followed his blockers beautifully and ended it with a Reggie Bushian somersault into the end zone.

2:46 The refs *so* want to call a penalty on something. 31-10 Buckeyes.

2:49 Anthony Schlegel has played a very good game today. He's been all over the backfield. (I just thought it warranted mentioning. Thank you.)

2:52 A.J. Hawk just got a huge sack on 3rd and 11. That dude is so much fun to watch. I can't wait until the Bears draft him next year.

2:53 Ted Ginn just got popped on the punt return. Fortunately, the refs chose to blow the whistle on this instance.

2:53 We're sitting in section 208, about 20 rows from the top. A dude behind us points out that somebody is stealing the Purdue flag that is perched atop the stadium behind us. He then scans the stadium and sees the Ohio State flag in section 201. He then declares to us, "I'm gonna go steal that Ohio State flag." I thought he was joking, but he went off in the direction of 201. It turns out the dude was as serious as a bike horn.

2:55 That's the end of the third quarter. 31-10 Buckeyes.

2:58 The Hoosiers hold on third down and force the Buckeyes to punt. The crowd goes wild!

3:03 The Hoosiers run the ball two straight times. Coach Hoeppner doesn't want the score to get any worse and he's trying to run the clock out.

3:04 The buddy of the flag dude tells us to check out the Ohio State flag. It's gone. But at the base of the pole are two cops getting ready to escort the flag dude out of the stadium. We're all laughing like baby llamas at that dude. Good times.

3:10 The Bucks are moving the ball again and Troy just hit Santonio for 26 more yards. There was a nice block by Teddy Ginn in there as well.

3:11 It's 1st and 10 for the Buckeyes at the Indiana 21 yard line. It's time for Pittman's third touchdown.

3:12 3rd and 1 from the 12. 0 yard run for Pittman. That poor dude. Huston comes in and kicks another field goal, making it 34-10.

3:16 (In Dick Enberg voice) Oh my! Jamario O'Neal! (end voice). Jamario just walloped the kick returner, but I'm not sure who got the worst of it.

3:17 There are mass substitutions going on on the defensive side of the ball right now.

3:18 Teddy Gone! Ginn just took the punt back for a touchdown from 62 yards away. Thankfully everybody had their helmets, pads, shoes, eye black, and breathe right strips on and were paying attention, and nobody was hit while being helpless. I had my arms raised signifying "touchdown" when Teddy was at the 45. 41-10 Buckeyes!

3:21 Indiana has fifteen yards rushing right now. I need sacks to reach my prediction of negative rushing yards. Oh well, at least I got my Pittman prediction right.

3:22 Ryan Pretorious got to kickoff after that Ginn touchdown. (Even though the PA announcer said it was Brian Robiskie.)

3:24 Hoosiers punt again, but this time they're punting to Gonzo and Robiskie (or Pretorious, I can't tell which is which.)

3:25 Justin Zwick comes in and gets a nice cheer from the remaining fans in attendance. I would've cheered, but I was too busy looking at the scoreboard reading the 456 yards of offense that we put up with Troy Smith at quarterback.

3:27 Zwick gets sacked and I yell, "Get rid of it!" I then look around and tell the people around me that "that's what you guys say when Troy gets sacked, right?"

3:30 And that's basically the end of the game. It was a great game to be a part of. My throat hurts and my head is pounding. I feel I've done my part. Coach Hoeppner says crowds help win games. I hope he appreciated my effort today.

3:31 Now let's go sit in the parking lot known as 70 East!

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